i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
