Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
