I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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