So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
He shit in the fireplace
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
