you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Randomize
