How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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