Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
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