I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
