I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Randomize
