Banned from zoo.
Again?
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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