what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Randomize
