took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Randomize
