My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
