Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
