it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
