I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
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