At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Randomize
