That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
