Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
