Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
