How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
this just has baby written all over it
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
