I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
