Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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