I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
