dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
