Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
