used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
