bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Randomize
