I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize
