No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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