if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
