Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
Randomize
