Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
