when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
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