No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
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