...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
