I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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