It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
What drink are we having for lunch?
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
