I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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