I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize
