So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Randomize
