Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
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