I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
