dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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