I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
