**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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