Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
