dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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