he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Randomize
