some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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